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  • Re: The Fat Bible

    From George Pope@1:153/757.2 to Daryl Stout on Sunday, June 27, 2021 14:38:05
    And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower
    and spinach, green and yellow vegetable of all kinds, so
    Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

    And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth
    the 99-cent double-cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man,
    "You want fries with that?"

    And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained pounds.

    I haven't seen this one in ages; I've stolen it & added it to my next edition of Metric Dozen, with a tip of my hat to you. . .

    And Satan brought forth chocolate. And woman gained pounds.

    Dark chocolate is actually very healthful (but only 1oz a day -- who limits choolsate in such a way?)

    And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak so big it needed
    its own platter.

    What exactly is chicken-fried steak?


    And Man went into cardiac arrest.

    And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

    And Satan created HMOs

    There it is! I've dealt with enough of these. . .no thanks!

    I've provided many clients excellent orgainsaton of their health management,
    & always provided firs world quality medical care at the best possible price (or no cost if their insurance isn't a scammer company)

    Q: Why doesn’t Santa have to provide health insurance for his workers?
    A: They’re technically Elf employed

    Q: What kind of health insurance do Halloween creatures have?
    A: Medi-SCARE!

    My son turned 27, so he's no longer covered by my health insurance.
    In other words, his manufacturer's warranty is up.

    A girl on Tinder told me she wanted to be friends with benefits.
    But I don't have health insurance or a retirement plan so I told her I couldn't.

    Asked my wife to dress up as a nurse tonight...
    to fulfill my fantasy...
    . . .that we have health insurance.

    Your friend,

    <+]:{)}
    Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
    --- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
    * Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)
  • From Daryl Stout@1:19/33 to George Pope on Sunday, June 27, 2021 17:41:00
    George,

    And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained pounds.

    I haven't seen this one in ages; I've stolen it & added it to my next edition of Metric Dozen, with a tip of my hat to you. . .

    Thanks. Now, it's "if it tastes good, spit it out".

    And Satan brought forth chocolate. And woman gained pounds.

    Dark chocolate is actually very healthful (but only 1oz a day -- who limits choolsate in such a way?)

    My sweet stuff are the Little Debbie Cosmic brownies. The caffeine in
    them (and in the diet green tea citrus) helps ease my migraine headaches,
    and helps keep the colon going...as it could be a real crappy situation otherwise.

    What exactly is chicken-fried steak?

    Not knowing how to describe it, I had to DuckDuckGo It (the heck with
    Bing and Google):

    According to Wikipedia:

    "Chicken fried steak, also known as country-fried steak or CFS, is an American breaded cutlet dish consisting of a piece of beefsteak coated
    with seasoned flour and either deep fried or pan-fried. It is sometimes associated with the Southern cuisine of the United States."

    I will add that thick gravy is a nice addition to it.

    And Man went into cardiac arrest.

    And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

    And Satan created HMOs

    There it is! I've dealt with enough of these. . .no thanks!

    That's my Medicare deal now...as I didn't have dental insurance
    before. When a tooth chipped on the lower denture, it cost $120 to
    fix.

    Q: Why doesn’t Santa have to provide health insurance for his workers?
    A: They’re technically Elf employed

    He needs the money to buy all the tools for building the toys/

    Q: What kind of health insurance do Halloween creatures have?
    A: Medi-SCARE!

    It ghost to show you that it can be boo-tiful if you have it, as since
    the Elm Street clinic closed, it became "A Nightmare On Elm Street".

    Asked my wife to dress up as a nurse tonight...
    to fulfill my fantasy...
    . . .that we have health insurance.

    I thought you wanted to doctor the situation and take a turn for the
    nurse. <G>

    Daryl

    ... I was up all night wondering where the sun went, but then it dawned on me. === MultiMail/Win v0.52
    --- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
    * Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (1:19/33)
  • From Dallas Vinson@1:123/256 to Daryl Stout on Tuesday, June 27, 2023 09:20:55
    PRAISE SATAN! :D :P

    --- Mystic BBS v1.12 A48 (Windows/64)
    * Origin: Legends of Yesteryear (furmenservices.net:23322) (1:123/256)
  • From Daryl Stout@1:2320/33 to Dallas Vinson on Wednesday, June 28, 2023 05:43:00
    Dallas,

    PRAISE SATAN! :D :P

    Never!! But, after all, he is "the destroyer". Yet, the joke is that
    "if it tastes good, it's bad for you".

    I would love to be eating healthy salads every day, but it's so rare
    to find iceberg lettuce anymore. I can't chew or digest the romaine
    (never mind they've had several cases of e.coli contamination with it
    over the years).

    Plus, I'm seeing more and more food recalls, and food shortages. With
    being on a fixed income, I'm limited at what I can afford to purchase
    in groceries. And, with not driving or having a car anymore, because of
    medical issues, I get my groceries and medications delivered, doing all
    of that online.

    Back to the issue of taste...there's a joke where the schoolteacher
    was using the candy LifeSavers to teach kids the flavors and colors,
    such as:

    Red: Cherry
    Yellow: Lemon
    Green: Lime
    Orange: Orange
    Purple: Grape
    Light Brown: Honey

    The kids couldn't figure out what the honey flavor was...and when
    the teacher asked "What does your Mommy call your Daddy??"...this
    girl screamed "SPIT IT OUT!! THEY'RE @$$HOLES!!" <BG>.

    The teacher just sat down and cried. :P

    Daryl

    ... Hors De Ourves - Sandwiches cut into many small pieces.
    === MultiMail/Win v0.52
    --- SBBSecho 3.20-Win32
    * Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (1:2320/33)